Episode 30: Carey Conley | Empowerment Through Visionary Leadership

Well, oh my goodness, everyone. You are in for a real treat today. We have the Carrie Connolly, who's a speaker, author, and vision expert helping men and women build self empowering skills through her signature vision methodology. After losing her husband and son to suicide just three years apart, Carrie found strength in her purpose to guide others towards healing, clarity, transformation. She speaks at events worldwide.

She spoke at our go abundance, dare to rise event and crushed it. She inspires audiences to shed fear and hardship to create powerful, fulfilling lives. She empowers others to pursue success in all areas, self love, finances, health, relationships, and faith. She's also the coauthor of the best selling book, Keep Looking Up, and it's got a new one coming out here in September that we're excited about.

So without further ado, Carrie Connolly. Well, welcome everybody to the Power Up Your Life podcast. I am Kelly Resendez.

And I'm Mandy McAllister.

We are powered by Govundance Women, and we have the incredible honor today to bring Carrie Connolly to you. She is a dear friend of mine and somebody that I just respect and has really shown me a lot of areas of my life that I could definitely, you know, move forward in. So with that said, Carrie, welcome, and tell us a little bit about your journey.

Thank you guys for having me. I'm thrilled to be here. You know, I have been unofficially a speaker and a coach for a little over thirty years. Officially stepped into the role, about fifteen years ago, and my specialty is helping people get a very clear vision for their life and their business.

Most people are kinda walking around with what I call their someday plan. Right? Just kinda rolling around in their head, and that doesn't equate into, you know, just taking action on your dream life and what you wanna really, accomplish.

So I have a methodology that I created that I walk people through on how to write their vision very powerfully so they can actually execute it.

That is incredible. Absolutely incredible. So given, you know, everyone's heard a little bit about your story. Mhmm. And the word that probably comes up the most as I as I look at your life is just resilient. Mhmm.

You know, you've been knocked down. Tell us a little bit about how you use this resiliency to be able to transcend the pain that you experienced in losing your your husband and your son in such a short period of time.

Yeah. Thank you. You know, I do get that question a lot. You know, how in the world are you still functioning, moving forward after losing them to suicide, three years apart? You know, there's a lot of things. I have a lot of faith, obviously, very deeply rooted in my faith, and my vision just got to where I now know why I am on this path to talk to people about having a strong vision for their life because it becomes your anchor in all the storms, which is, you know, we have a a book collaboration coming out called Unshakeable Stories to Anchor You Through Life Storms. I have 20 different authors that have all written stories on their own adversities they've been through and what anchored them through it. So I'm super excited about that coming out.

You know, I just have a lot of things in the works. I still coach mostly a lot of, service based entrepreneurs to get their vision out so that they can monetize it. But I'm also building a community for young adults, early twenties to early thirties because I know that they're really struggling right now, and I wanna help them understand that they can create a vision for their life that they will stay anchored in to help them get through all the things they're going through now as well.

So resilient, yes, but really it's because I'm I'm so anchored in so many things that are moving me forward that I just kinda stay focused on that.

I love that. I we talk a lot on the podcast about getting unstuck, you know, hitting some sort of a plateau and needing to get past it. And, you know, in your own life and, you know, working with all of these clients, I'm I'm sure that there are patterns. Right?

So, you know, obviously, with the vision in mind, if I am someone who's feeling stuck, what are the first one or two actionable things that I could do to get myself unstuck?

Well, the first thing is is writing the vision so that you have some light at the end of the tunnel. Right? So, and I have certainly felt stuck at many, many times in my career. I was originally in the network marketing industry when I was raising my kiddos. Lots of, you know, rejection and a lot of fallout and a lot of times where I was like, I am so out of here. You know, you just wanna quit. And then jump jumping into, of course, the speaking of coaching career.

So but the thing again that kept me going is that my vision was bigger than whatever I was feeling at the moment. Uh-huh. So it's always about having a bigger vision that gets you through whatever you're feeling that day. So it's always been about the vision, and then it's always for me taking just some sort of baby step. Right?

It doesn't have to be a monumental thing. I think a lot of people think that it's gotta be this overwhelming big steps that you take. And really every day for me, it's just what is the most important thing today that I can do that I can stay focused on that lines up with the vision to just keep moving forward. So it's babies.

Yeah. What a recipe. You know, I I definitely agree with you on the vision thing. I'm big on that too and how we really wanna feel in our life.

And then the action is really where, you know, for anybody listening that's gone through grief, and I think that we all have. You know, I can't relate to the same, you know, situation that you did, and I would never never, you know, say that I could truly understand because there there are probably people listening that have lost a child, that have lost a spouse, and those are just you know, unless you experience it, it just would never be able to, you know, feel that same way.

And so it sounds like you had already been doing a lot of this work prior to these things. And so, you know, whether or not we realize it that, you know, sometimes we wait until something bad happens to start some of these things.

Share a little bit about why you believe no matter maybe even somebody super successful right now and they've been winning, but they don't have this vision for what they want in their life. Like, tell us a little bit about why you believe you should be preparing at all times for whatever life brings you.

Well, we just don't know what's gonna happen. Right? I mean, prior to losing my husband and my son, like I said a minute ago, I was already an entrepreneur for many, many years, and there was a lot of times I just wanted to quit and not keep moving forward.

And I so I think people there's so when I walk people through writing their vision, which I do at events, I ask them after they write it how they felt. And a lot of people will give me positive words like this is fun. This is exciting. I can see light at the end of the tunnel. It's inspiring me. But then I also get words like it's it's scary because now they feel like, oh, okay. Now I gotta actually do this. Right? Mhmm. And a lot of feelings around, am I equipped? Am I worthy? Will I be supported? There's just a lot of fear that comes up, and we think we have a lot of time.

It's like, we can push this off. It's okay. I can work them on. I'll do it next year. But the other thing that I do, you guys, is I get people to put nonnegotiable dates on their achievements that they wanna go after because we will keep pushing it off unless we do that.

And one example is when I first stepped into Arbonne was the company that I was in. I had a two year old. I was working full time, and I was five months pregnant. And my goal, my nonnegotiable goal before my daughter was born was to be able to get to a certain level in Arbonne to be able to quit my job and get my son out of day care. Oh, that's easy. That goal was truly nonnegotiable. Right? So I had to go to work every day to make that happen.

Yeah. Well, it's a there's nothing like the timer of a baby to really turn up the heat. You know? It's that idea of Parkinson's law that however much time you give something is how long it's gonna take you. You know? If you wanna in your house and you give yourself an hour, it'll take an hour. If you give yourself a week, it'll take a week. I I completely resonate with that, and I gotta write down some more nonnegotiable dates after this.

In the world of being an entrepreneur, I there are so many unconventional thinkers. Right? There's there's so many, people drawn to entrepreneurship that that think differently than the the pack. What is an unconventional strategy that that you have or that most people might disagree with that you really hold strong to?

Well, we're all crazy. So word. You know, I just I think I had this conversation with somebody the other day. Two women who are very successful entrepreneurs said, you know, I I just I find it hard to have conversations with people who aren't entrepreneurs because they don't understand how our brain works.

They just don't, you know, we think outside the box. We think our brains are always firing. We're always coming up with new ideas, you know.

And I totally got that. I said, you know, that's so true. I said, most of my friends are entrepreneurs because we all we all we all accept each other the way we are.

Yeah. I feel well. I

well, that's the kind of the we hear that a lot in GoBundance women, you know, because at the football field, there's only so many conversations about my nail color I can have with the moms. I wanna talk about this million dollar business. Nails. Are you kidding me? There. Yeah. I mean, the toenail. Okay. But I agree with that completely, Carrie. Yes.

Yeah. Yeah. And that power of proximity, I think, is is is part of your recipe. More about if somebody is feeling isolated, which is very common in the mental health space, very common on the entrepreneurial journey.

You know, You know, I see some of the biggest influencers continue to say, like, you aren't gonna have as many friends or you're this or that. And I'm already like, you've already created limiting beliefs to what this experience could look like. And I believe wholeheartedly, we get to create whatever it is that we desire.

You know, I manifested the heck out of this Mandy McAllister girl that's sitting right here. You know, and my vision was to connect with more ambitious, like minded women that wanted to change the world, and then here you are in my life.

So for the woman listening that doesn't have a network and doesn't actually have those people in their life like you do or like I do, where would you tell them to start?

Well, there's so many great commune communities. GoBundance, of course,

is amazing. The best one. Yes.

I mean, just the caliber of women you have in your organization is just amazing, you guys. Seriously. I've gotten to know several of them just from speaking at your event last April.

But even before knowing about GoBundance, I was always seeking out a community that it could be in. Being becoming an entrepreneur, first of all, in network marketing in in a company like Arbonne that was a lot of women. I had a built in community when I started that business, and it was so helpful to have women that were supporting me, cheering me on along the way, especially on the days that I said where it got tough and I wanted to quit. And so many of them saying, just keep going. We believe in you.

And I have always been a big networker. So I network a lot so that I don't have that feeling of isolation because I think a lot of us now, especially working at home, can feel that. I certainly can feel that because I'm single and, you know, live alone, and my family's in another state, two other states, actually. So I I end up traveling a lot. I've actually said to you, Kelly, don't be surprised if I end up at your door tomorrow.

I would love it. I won't be here, but you are welcome anytime, girl. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. That's great. You gotta seek them out.

Yeah. I well, my husband has this my husband has this joke that I just meet all my friends on the Internet because you you people think like me. Right? It's it's just you there's so many resources that you can, go find.

You're you're now diving into helping the younger generation, the the leadership of the early twenties to early thirties. If we have someone like that in our lives, what are some different things that we could be helping them with? Like, what what is the different pattern that these this younger generation has to deal with that's actionable?

So there's dealing with so many things, you guys. One is that they are also feeling very isolated and lonely. Statistically, they are the loneliest generation we have right now, which kinda shocked me because I thought it would be my age group.

I think a lot of that loneliness comes from a couple of things. One, Mel Robbins covers this really well in her newest book, Let Them. The title is called Let Them. She talks a lot about what happens with them is that they, from birth, are, you know, born into a tribe. Right? They have their family, then they have their schoolmates, their sports and other activities. If they go into college, they've got that whole community. And I saw this, you know, with my son. You know, so many tight relationships.

And then they come out of college, and they all go to different places, different states, different, cities, and different jobs where they don't have that built in community, and it takes them a while to kinda figure it out. And in the meantime, they're also feeling the pressure of, am I making enough money? How can I make more money? How can I get out of debt? How can I build healthy relationships? Now they're trying to figure out how to function not around their family and adulting. Right?

So there's a lot happening for them right now, and we need to let them know that they are supported no matter what. And I think that's the hardest part of all is a lot of them get into jobs that they figure out and aren't really what they wanna do because we told them what to do. Mhmm.

Yeah. Yeah. That's great. Yeah. My son my son, Cole, had the opportunity to hop on a call that you hosted recently, and he were raved about just the quality of connection and the quality of content that you put out there. So we will make sure that we leave this in the show notes too because it is such an important, you know, message.

So I wanna dig in a little bit into the parenting aspect of being an entrepreneur since, you know, yes, we wanna impact our young adults and not completely screw them up. Right? And we have a lot of things that we can do as a parent to stay present. And, you know, you kinda nailed it. Like, our parents tell us what to do. That's one of my main rules is no opinions. You know, just really I I believe our children are equipped to find their own purpose and passion along the way and that we're just there to kinda support them.

Give us a few things that as parents that are entrepreneurs that we can do to really inspire our children to actualize their potential.

Yeah. This is such a deep question, and I love that you're asking this because, it's so on my heart right now because now I have grandchildren. And I think as parents, what we have to do is not put our expectations on them. And I think that comes from a lot of our own baggage that we had growing up. So what we want to do unknowingly is put onto them some pressure that they need to excel in areas that maybe we didn't. So we need to be really aware of that.

And what you're saying, Kelly, about no opinions, you know, it's so hard when we're wanting to them to go with a safe path, and they wanna go maybe into a a more unconventional path. So I think it's so cool that you have raised your kids that way, Kelly, because that's that's very unconventional. Because, unfortunately, in this world, most of us are still following a path of you need to go to the right schools, you need to get in the right colleges, you need to get into a a degree that you're gonna get have a title and make good money. And sometimes that's just not the path they wanna go down.

So it's it's hard not to put those expectations on them and to support them in in the way that they wanna go. And I have to tell you, it scares them to try and go a different path where they feel like they might be disappointing their parents or their peers

very, very hard. I mean, I feel like many of us lived that as children, so the opportunity to impact the next generation in a different way is so incredibly important.

On that kind of other side of the coin of being a a mom and an entrepreneur at the same time, you know, in my little world of investing, a lot of times, women will say, I don't wanna take away time from my kids to go build this business or to go underwrite that property or to to go live my dream.

If you're looking back at yourself twenty however many years ago when you were the mom entrepreneur, What advice would you give yourself about that prioritization or or dealing with and achieving in both the mom realm and the entrepreneurship realm?

It was teamwork. I saw it as a team effort. So when I started doing, Arbonne, I had very small amounts of time I could work on my business, especially because I had two babies at home. Right? So for first season, it was I had, like, an hour to two hours a day when they napped. So I time blocked that in, and I was really, really good at sticking to my time blocks.

So when I went into my office while they were napping to work, that's when I worked. I didn't do anything else. And then when they were up, I shut the door, went into mom mode. Then I was gone two nights a week doing Arbonne parties. These these were the days you guys when my literally, we were doing the whole facial thing. Right?

But I communicated that to them that this is when I needed to work. This is why I was doing it. And why I was doing it was so that I could, earn all the trips that I earned to take them on. Right? So they knew that I was always in qualification for something for the family, and we were a team. So it was always a lot of communicating.

And it's not a you're not taking from them. It was just I invited them into that. You know, they were a big part of everything that I did, and all the ups and downs. They knew on the days where I wanted to quit. Right? But they were always my biggest encouragers, and they were the biggest reason why I never did because I've always felt like if I quit on the days when it got hard, what kind of example would that be for them later in life?

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I think that's another big parenting that a lot of people have to embody is that, you know, we need to be the change that we see in our kids. Right. And, you know, we complain about them being on their phones, but if we're on our phones or if we complain about them getting angry or frustrated, yet they hear us in traffic getting angry and frustrated, it just is not you know, it's it's definitely a waste of energy. So Yeah.

You know, Carrie, what would you tell somebody right now that's listening? That's like, I wanna start a business. I wanna take the same leap of faith that you've done. I wanna leave my w two. I wanna start doing something different. Maybe I'm at home with the kids. Like, to really take that first next step to being able to create something different, where would you guide that person?

Well, again, the first thing is getting a vision on on the lifestyle that you want. So how I manifested all of this into my life was I was in my late twenties when I was doing nine to five thing like we all were doing. And I had a mentor who said to me, you know, it's not you're not you're never gonna fit that mold, Carrie. You need to get clear on what it is that you want for your life and go after that. And so she was the first person who said, sit down and take a day and write it all out. Define to me what you want that life to look like.

So I wrote a lot of things around. I wanted to work from home. When I we had our kids, I wanted to make residual income. I wanted to take really great trips. I wanted to be with a company that had great leadership. So when I was presented, network marketing Arbonne, I knew in an instant that was it and it because it checked all the boxes.

So the first thing again, and I'm gonna point back to is to answer your question is you've gotta get really clear on the lifestyle that you want because there's never more never before have we had so many different options you can choose from, so many different paths you can take. And I see a lot of women trying to do two or three different paths at the same time and get really frustrated and burned out. So you've gotta just pick the one that right now makes the most sense and aligns with what you want and get that up and running before you think about doing something else. So action steps towards whatever that little vision is for you.

I think I that is so incredibly important. The I when I talk about, investing in real estate stuff, if you're just trying to do anything, you're gonna find nothing. You know? But if you just pick one thing that is reasonable enough, a book that we have in our welcome packet GoBundance Women is the, Psychology of Money. And it this idea of needing to be perfect, you're never gonna freaking be perfect. Just be reasonable enough, and then you're gonna achieve beyond your wildest dreams.

That is maybe one of my favorite things that you've said here today, Carrie, but there's a couple more, bombs that you've dropped, that I believe. This idea that you if something is hard, you have to have a vision that is bigger than what I'm feeling in the moment. Right. That that hit me really hard. Kelly, what about you?

I mean, so many, Carrie, but I think the biggest takeaway is that we should be preparing ourselves for whatever life brings us. You know? You didn't anticipate the suffering that your family went through and losing your husband and your son, yet you were already working on yourself. And so for anyone listening, you know, you have to invest in yourself and your network to be able to connect with those people.

And then I just wanna, you know, mad honor for you for creating this young adults community. I mean, it this is a selfless project that you're really doing to be able to do that, and we're here to support you in any way that we can on that. So you have absolutely been a tremendous guest.

One of the things that we always wanna do is know, like, what's one resource or connection that would change the ballgame for you, for your business that we can all be looking towards towards, supporting you on?

What what are you asking me specifically, Kelly? What can you support me in right now?

Absolutely. If there's a resource, a connection, an event, anything that we can do to be able to support you and then share with us how our listeners can get in touch with you as well. Well, I do have a big event coming up in September,

September 26, and it's called Vision is Victory. It's a signature event that I used to do every January, and I haven't done it since 2017. But it is in that, an event where a couple of things are gonna be happening.

But I will take most of September 26 and walk people through how to write their vision. They will actually have time there to write it. Because even though I tell people how to do it, they don't go home and do it. So we're gonna do it there, and then we're gonna unpack it. We're gonna talk about what's keeping you stuck, what are some action steps you can take.

We're gonna be giving out some awards that evening to some visionary leaders like you, miss Kelly Grazendes. We're gonna be giving you a legacy builder award, one of our first ones. So we're really excited about the award ceremony.

And the night before all of this, we're gonna have a meet and greet with this, book launch that I have that I mentioned earlier. We're gonna have all the authors there and all the attendees getting to meet each other and having the authors tell their story and sign books. So a lot of moving parts with some really amazing people.

I think maybe your girl crush is gonna be there, Mandy.

Which one?

You? Yeah. Well, me, but the other one in Arizona. I just heard through the grapevine, she might be there. So I love it. Yes. Who are we talking about? Sharon. Yeah. She'll be there for sure. Sharon will be there.

Mandy, get that get those dates on your calendar, girl. I'm Consider it done. I have a find out more on the event. Where do we go to find out if people wanna attend, get in touch with you, be a part of your communities? Like, help us out.

Yeah. So, we are loading that landing page onto my website literally as we speak, and my website is just carrieconley.com. I'm also gonna give you a link. You guys will have a link as well, Kelly, that you can share out. Perfect. Invite people and get a special, discount code from you as well for being a part of your community.

Well, if you're listening and you really wanna solidify your vision and be surrounded with amazing like minded women, definitely check out Carrie's event. But you have been an amazing guest. Thank you for the light that you bring in to my life and to the world and to young adults as well.

So but if you love this episode, share it, like it, tell everybody about it, and we'll see you on the next episode. Thanks, Carrie.

Thank you, Carrie.

Thank you.